Friday, May 18, 2012

What's your deepest fear?

Everybody is afraid of something, if your not afraid of anything then lucky you but even if you say that I doubt it. Common fears are usually spiders, snakes, the dentist, clowns, death, hights. Which some of them i don't get. I understand spiders, snakes, death and hights. But the dentist and clowns? Really? I mean, you just have to understand that it's just a person! That looks weird. And the dentist is really nobody to be scared of. I really don't understand that one. If your a little kid, yeah sure i get it. But you should grow out of that. If i was afraid of the dentist i would tell you why but i'm not so i can't. Death, i understand because there's so little known about it. Spiders are just... creepy so i get that and snakes. Plus all the fantasy about spiders and snakes just help that thought. Personaly, i'm not afraid of hights, it's getting there that's the problem. Like for a long time I was scared of the atic. Not because of the atic it's self, not because of how high it was, because of the ladder and getting up there. Once i'm up there, I'm fine, but getting there is the problem. Oh and i hate bridges some times, because I'm afraid they're going to collapse. But that's a minor fear that I can always talk my self out of and be fine. Here is a list of things i'm afraid of (not nessisarily in order)
1. Death- Is it painful to die? I mean of course it depends of the way i die which brings me to: I don't wanna die by burning... or drowning... or being murdered or bleeding to death....
2. Pain- I know this is ridduculus and laugh at me if you want to but yes, i'm afraid of pain. This is why i used to be afraid of shots and needles, which i've grown out of, i still don't like it but I'm okay with it now.
3. Spiders- This has a whole backstory to it involving a dream, but its not little harmless spiders i'm afraid of it's the black widow and the brown recluess because they are very deathly.
4. Snakes- i don't like them, i'm afraid of getting bitten and dieing. So basicly this comes with my fear of dieing i guess.
5. Getting shut in the elevator- Yes i know, ridduculus but I don't like elevators because i'm afraid of the cables snaping or getting shut in the door. It happens and i don't want my limbs snapped off and plus it sounds so painful, again i'm afraid of pain.

All of these are big fears of mine. I'm afraid of snakes, spiders and getting shut in the elevator because it enolves pain and maybe death. But you wanna know my deepest fear? The reason I'm afraid of dieing? It's because my deepest fears is waking up one day and realizing I've wasted my life. (pause for dramatic effect so you can let that sink in) I'm afraid of dieing before i do something meaningful in my life. Dieing before I effect change, do something, acomplish the impossible. My biggest fear is that I'm wasting the greatest gift of all: Life. And this isn't a joke, I really am afraid of this, I mean i look at my life now and I think "gosh I've wasted so many years!" And i don't want that to happen before it's to late. I mean, i look back and think "Life is short and years ago i was mad because i didn't get a toy? Or I fought with my brother about who got the last slice of piza?!?! Does it really MATTER?" And don't get on to me about being some old person because this is my deepest fear, it think this is a completely good and wise fear to have! I mean really! Did you ever stop to think about that? I didn't intill this year when i really started thinking about how other people have gone out and done some really amazing things and about how i've always wanted to do something like that and then I realize "Wow, that's my fear, dieing before i get something done, wasting my life away" And I think putting these thoughts on paper is a step in the right direction for me. Putting my thoughts on this blog, may one day inspire somebody, or even make people lisen. I think about who i am and realize: "I talk about these things because my biggest dream is to change the world" I think this fear, is the only fear that matters.
Your wiseful Blogger,
(I'm going to put this thought in a quote let me think for a minute...)

No comments:

Post a Comment