Thursday, February 20, 2014

Valentine's Day Bekah's List

I'd like to make it known that I am not a big fan of Valentines day. In fact I usually refuse to call it Valentines. Instead it is Valentimes. Yes I know it's silly. I do not care. I just like the m in there better. It just... Is. Anyways, for thoose who didn't know, the original "Valentines" can be dated back to a two week festive in roman times celebrating the goddess Venus (It's Aphrodite get it right you stupid Romans. I'm sorry, personal issues here). They would take a virgin cow and all the single men would take a strip of it's hide. Then, they proceeded to leave a Valentine or mark on the single woman they fancied. Yes, the original valentine was a mark of a virgin cows BLOOD. Ew.
Anyways, I have this quirky fun friend named Bekah. This year, Bekah wrote a few notes about why she doesn't like Valentines. Here it is:

1.) Valentines day is over rated. But...... I do like chocolate. Especially marked down chocolate on the 15th.  It's nice. Not as nice as a dozen roses, a giant teddy bear that love you, and a large heart shaped box of caramels and cremes from a cute boy...... But still nice. I guess.

2.) Roses are red, violets are blue. Cupid is stupid, and so are you.

3.) Single Awareness Day is a great example of putting a positive spin on things. Even if it still spells "SAD"....

4.) Fat Naked Flying Babies with Weapons are creepy anyways...

5.) Don't give children weapons they say.... Then they dedicate an entire day to a Naked Child with a mind altering Bow and Arrow. 

6.) In Japan, people who don't get anything on Valentines day get a free meal. I wish I lived in Japan.....

7.) Also in Japan, a girl is supposed to give to every guy in her life, and a month later the guys must give the girls chocolate three time the value if the original gift. Again, I want to be Japanese.

8.) Roses are red ( and white and pink and peach and yellow) and violets are blue (or...yuh know... Violet) and valentines day is great!(unless you are single, or allergic to chocolate)

9.) Love is just a dirty trick played on us to ensure the continuation of the species.

10.) Why don't we all get tickets at a Chinese theatre, and make sure to get odd numbered seats. The even couples would watch the movie alone!

11.)Table for one. Money to buy As much food as you want OR table for two, and sweating about the bill.
So there you have it. 11 reasons to dislike Valentines... Well technically I think #10 is just something evil to do but whatever.
She made this list of course, one block before her crush gave her a Valeo-gram asking her out...
The irony is not lost on me.
I always dress up for Valentines day because it's just an exuse to look nice :) but what I really wanted for valentines was a tub of Hershey's frosting... Mmm they way to my heart is through my stomach ;P I'm going to get fat eating to my heart's content some day. Hahaha. Anyways, hope you enjoyed my friend's Valentines list!
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